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Danielle Marie
25 May 2009 @ 01:08 am
It's a little past one in the morning and I just got off the phone with Adam. Damn how I miss that boy. I want so much to be laying in bed with him right now. Romantically snug in his arms looking into his beautifully blue eyes. Just perfectly content, warm, and comfy in bed. I would love soo damn much for that to be happening right now. I love that man so much. I miss my prince charming.
 
 
Current Mood: lovedloved
 
 
Danielle Marie
05 June 2008 @ 05:38 pm
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Current Mood: lovedloved
 
 
Danielle Marie
05 June 2008 @ 01:14 pm
I miss Adam so much. I just wish he was here with me. Especially at night so I can fall asleep in his arms, and have him be there to wake up to in the morning. I miss him waking me up with soft kisses in the morning.  He really is the only person that makes me feel beautiful and makes me feel like I matter. I love him so much I really don't know what I would do without him in my life. I hate not being able to have him here with me. Hopefully by this time next year he will be.
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Current Mood: lonelylonely
 
 
Danielle Marie
03 June 2008 @ 08:44 pm
I feel so depressed. I dont know what to do to make myself feel better. I have never felt so ugly... Its hard to explain but i just do. Im afraid to eat anything. And if I do even if its the littlest of something I feel so guilty. I dont know what to do to be ok.. I just dont know....
 
 
Current Mood: gloomygloomy
 
 
Danielle Marie
27 May 2008 @ 05:49 pm
    I found out today that I passed my Journalism Class and Communications Class with a B-. I am extremly happy about that. I'm still waiting for my Health online class to give me a grade. I am so happy right now I can just die. I seriously worked my ass off this semester to get decent grades. And if I pass my health class I have cosmetology to look forward to in September. I am so excited. Everything is finally going the way it should. Good grades, steady job, amazing boyfriend. What else could I ask for? I looked up the prices for my books for next semester and it came out to about $90.50 (not including tax). Keep in mind its just my books, not my cosmetology kit that I have to buy and uniform. I still need to get information on how and where to buy all of that. But I don't want to buy anything until I know for sure what my final grade is in my Health class.
    This weekend my mother is having a Partylite party. It's basically a candle party. And since I have no life and my boyfriend totally lives in a different state. I basically have no choice but to attend. Oh and its going to be at my house. So im basically expected to be there. Oh well I guess. I have my "birthday party" on saturday. What started off as just a family dinner is now considered a party. People I don't even like are going to be there. I'm just happy about the food and cake. (I hope they get me my favorite cake =/ ). Hopefully between all of this I make it to the movies to go watch Sex and The City the Movie. I can't fucking wait. I hope Carrie marry's Mr. Big aka Chris Noth aka omg hella handsome. So basically I turn twenty next Tuesday. I can't believe it I'm getting so old.
    Speaking of birthdays my hubby turns 21 on the 18th. Hopefully he likes what I'm going to make him and buy him =/ . I'm saving my money like crazy because he's moving here next year. And I want to be really prepared and make sure I have enough money set aside for school. So basically I'm still missing him like fucking crazy. I love him so much I just want him to be here already.
 
 
Current Mood: jubilantjubilant
 
 
 
Danielle Marie
25 May 2008 @ 11:51 pm
I miss him. I miss him so bad. Why the fuck is this so hard. I just want to be there with him thats all I want. I want to wake up in the morning and know that hes here with me. But hes not. And every day without him gets harder and more depressing. I hate not being able to be with him. 
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Current Mood: sadsad
 
 
Danielle Marie
23 May 2008 @ 10:19 pm
 
 
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Danielle Marie
02 May 2008 @ 05:06 pm
Rant  
I am not ok with my life right now. This is my journal and I'm allowed to rant so deal with it. I feel so stuck and not in control of my own life. The world seems to hate me. Looking back on my life I see how self destructive I have been in the past. I use to tell myself I would never get back into old routines. I've started smoking again, among other things. Sometimes I wish I could go to sleep and never wake up so I wouldnt have to deal with all of this. I dont want to deal with any of this. 
 
 
Current Mood: apatheticapathetic
 
 
Danielle Marie
25 April 2008 @ 11:36 am
life  
I finally decided that I want to take cosmetology classes. So since I am already enrolled at Gavilan I will be able to register for my fall classes on the 5th of May instead of the 12th. So I'm excited that I can take my cosmetology classes here in Gilroy. It's going to make it really easy on me because of money issues. I wont be working as much or at all for that matter because I will be going full time. So it really is going to be a hard two years. But its only two years and at the end I can take my test from the state and get my license. I talked with the people at the school and they said that their program was so good. That they never had someone fail the test. So i'm really really excited. Not looking forward to the money trouble but I still live at home and I don't need much. And I think my mom and stepdad said they would help me out as much as they can. Still no help from my dad. I figured as much. He called me last Friday to tell me that I am no longer on his insurance. So as of right now if something happens to me I am basically fucked. He said not to tell my mom because there is going to be a big argument and to wait a week to see what happened and why I am no longer on his insurance. I'm suppose to be covered until im 23 so I honestly don't know whats going on with that. And to be honest im really stressed out about it.
Well changing the subject to not so good news to really really good news. Adam is coming May 15th and I am so happy and excited. I cant wait till he is here with me and we get to catch up on all the regular things we haven't done yet. All I want is for him to be here so I can hug him and hold his hand and do regular normal boyfriend girlfriend stuff. Like go out to dinner and go to the movies and just hang out. We are both really excited and we are staying together for 4 days. You would think I would be nervous with like sharing a room and a bed with him for 4 days but I'm not. So in less than 3 weeks he will be here. Theres so much I want to do with him. I cant wait!
And on May 31st I am having a birthday dinner at my house and I'm inviting my family over and stuff. Im turning twenty. thats so weird. but is should be fun. hopefully.
 
 
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Danielle Marie
04 April 2008 @ 10:24 am
like anyone really cares but i had a good time yesterday and i want to share. if you dont want to read about my mcr experience then dont read any furhter.



anyways

i get to the civic auditorium around 11ish and for the most part im waiting by myself. As soon as i get there some girl recognizes me from the boards and calls out my name and says hi. I noticed a lot of people from project rev. the reason i remember them is because they are in a lot of my pictures from then. from waiting in line and stuff. so like typical mcr fans there was a girl that was there since 5pm the day before. and she was going to multiple shows. which was cool i guess. for her. some dude from sj state came and he came up to me first asking me how long i had been there and i was like well not as long as her and so he interviewed her and stuff about my chem and whatever. jewlie got all pissed and was trying to act like she didnt care. lmao it made me giggle. for the most part it was a chill day a lot of smoking and a lot of lounging around. I felt sad because i met this really cool chick from LA and it was like her first concert and we hung out and shared cheez its but when the line started forming and i got in i lost her because i was like f it i want to go to the front. and with no trouble i did. drive by was good. i thought the bass was a cutie bc he kept moving around all weird. billy talent was so good. except for the major amount of spit. mcr was next and yes i screamed ray!!!!!!!! a bajillion times and it was sooo good. id have to say one of their best performance i have seen. it started off super slow bc gee was singing vampires all slow and pretty. it was amazing. they sang all the b sides and they sang desert song. it was a good mix of revenge and the black parade. i got my chin kicked and hands stepped on by security. and ray was drinking Heineken and was wearing an evil dead tee. everyones hair was super long. except for franks. bob looked so cute he was smiling all big while he drumming. and i think gee still writes on himself. either that or he got a tatt. it might have been a tatt. and he dedicate one of the b sides to lyn z. which was sweet. cortez was amazingly cute. i was watching him while they were doing sound check and stuff. oh and they had one of the crew members play hermonica during teenages. it was good shit. the best part of the night is when they played you know what they do to guys like us in prison. bc he made a speech about how his mom told him and mikey that they were made for the bright lights of the county jail (prison) and that everyday they were ganna have a little piece of their sweet ass taken away. and he started screaming (like imatating) what it was going to sound like and he squeezed his buttcheeks together all crazy. i was loling the entire time. it was good times.
 
 
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